4. I am prejudiced. I try so very hard not to be, but some stereotypes are just too ingrained for me to override. I'm not racist or sexist or… umm, religionist. No, my prejudice is a bit outside the mainstream. Whenever I see a man wearing a bow tie I automatically assume he's an arrogant prick. Bow ties give me this irrational urge to give their wearers a beatdown and then force feed them their ties while screaming "Supply-side this, you filthy little Reaganites!"

I've been working on it and I'm proud to say I've been showing improvement. I no longer fly into a blind rage at the sight of a wedding party. And I've finally made peace with the ghost of John Houseman.

You and I know that this is a sickness, but those bastards at the Social Security Administration refuse to recognize that I have a legitimate disability. But don't worry, I'll wear them down eventually.