I think I'm beginning to define my life as a series of breakfasts. Not that there's anything wrong with that.
Tag archives for breakfast
Thursday, June 7, 2007
Wednesday, June 6, 2007
Mmm… omelette
We're taking The Chicken to breakfast on his last day of school. Mm… omelette…
Thursday, May 24, 2007
Breakfast
Mmm… omelette. I love Thursdays. Breakfast at work days.
Thursday, April 26, 2007
More bullet points
-
Bullet points make for a pretty easy post.
-
There was no bike riding practice last night (shitty weather) but The Chicken was doing smashingly on Tuesday evening. He's doing well enough he's now to the point where he's trying to show off for girls. A girl named Ines, one of his classmates, was at the park when we were there. Every time Chicken rode past, he had to look to see if she was watching. Once when she was checking him out, Chicken tried to stand up to pedal. He's never done this before and we've not yet encouraged him to do this. He nearly wiped out and quickly sat down again. And then looked to see if Ines was still watching. Any time he fell, he always jumped up like he was sitting on a spring, and then checked to see if Ines saw his crash. Cool boys don't whimper about banged knees, you know.
Ines rides the same school bus and also loaned him a Pokemon book last week.
I think he's sweet on her. Little playa.
-
The other day I mentioned the construction in my neighborhood. Well, it's easily more annoying now than it was then. All the construction is now around the corner, so my street has a quickie asphalt patch. This patch has settled and now has more bumps and contours than the dark side of the moon. I go around the block so I don't have to drive over it.
-
I heart playing around with code.
I just finished a small project that was befuddling me off and on for a few weeks. In the end it turns out I was overthinking it. The finished script is only 30 lines of code. I always feel a little dumb when I realize something is much simpler than I expected. But I also feel like a fucking super hero when I see the elegance of the results.
I love this shit.
-
It's Thursday. I fucking love Thursdays. Not only is it almost Friday, but it's also the day I have breakfast at work in the morning and a coffee "date" with Bunny in the afternoon.
Sometimes I also do some work on Thursdays.
Wednesday, January 17, 2007
I'm a great guy. And I'm lazy.
Last Tuesday morning Bunny came from work early and wanted to go out for breakfast with The Chicken before school. I wasn't very excited by that idea. I'm a creature of habit and didn't really like my routine being turned on its ear. That's not really what I wanted to do with my morning. So I grumped and grumbled and they went to breakfast without me.
Chicken felt pretty damn special. Bunny decided she wants to do that about once a week. This morning Bunny was home early and I quietly asked her if she wanted to take him to breakfast. Chicken wanted to, and he asked about it a few minutes earlier, but Bunny didn't have the money for it.
So I paid. I gave Bunny some money and sent them merrily skipping on their way. Chicken thinks he's pretty cool. He loves getting to go out for breakfast. This made his day.
And I didn't have to get off my ass and go stand at that cold fucking bus stop this morning. I'm pretty sure that was worth the money.
Thursday, March 9, 2006
Oh. My. GOD!
It's Hangover Thursday, which follows Bird's… ahem… "Choir Practice" Wednesday, so it's breakfast at work day at my office. Just before Goat arrived with the grub, a sweet little old lady came in for help with her laptop.
Among the questions she asked was, "Now, what's the space bar?" The space bar. The woman doesn't know the space bar. How the hell does that happen? How can one live seventy years and never acquire a passing familiarity with a keyboard, or even a typewriter?
Anyway, ninety minutes later I'm now ready to enjoy my breakfast.
Thursday, February 9, 2006
The Thursday morning ritual
Thursday is breakfast day at my office. Or at least it has been lately.
Wednesday night is, ahem, "Choir Practice" night for Bird. So every Thursday morning she comes in a little hung over and ready for eggs.
I even planned ahead this week so I didn't have to dig change out of the car to pay for my farmer's omelette with wheat toast.
Tuesday, December 27, 2005
Scenes from a holiday weekend
Friday
Teenage goth kid #1: Is my ass digging into your hip?
Me: Yeah, but it's all good.
***
Me: All you're missing now is someone to pee on you.
The Bard: haha! Yeah, that's just what I need!
Me: So can I?
The Bard: Umm…
***
Me: Nice boots. KISS, Destroyer, 1978?
Teenage goth kid #1: Uh, no. Cradle of Filth, 2004.
Me: I really showed my age there didn't I?
Teenage goth kid #1: KISS?
***
The Bard: Hey! No fucking in the champagne room!
***
The Bard: Dude, what the hell were you two doing back there?
Teenage goth kid #2: Looking at cock rings on the internet.
The Bard: What the fuck?
Teenage goth kid #2: I can't take her to the sex shops with me.
Teenage goth kid #1: She's not 18 yet?
Teenage goth kid #2: Not until May.
Me: I really can't relate to this at all.
The Bard: How old are you anyway?
***
Sister: I feel so old.
Me: Shut up.
***
Hector: My crabs are huge! They're like lobsters!
(pause)
Hector: Wanna see?
***
Sister: Why is it I can never leave without you telling me something new about Pakistan?
Me: This will be a lot less painful if you don't struggle.
Saturday
Me: I should have bought a copy of Serenity while I was shopping today. Now I'm going to have to wait until Monday to see it.
The Bunny: I thought you said your mom was getting it for you.
Me: heh. Yeah. Wait.
***
Mom: If not for you, I wouldn't even get swiss cheese. And then I'd have to listen to the other two whine.
Sister: I'm not cool enough for my own cheese.
***
Sister: Wow! Look at all these goodies! I'm so loved.
Me: But you're still not cool enough for your own cheese.
***
Mom: Demon child #1, will you go in my bedroom and get Uncle RNB a roll of toilet paper? (giving directions) No, not that pile of stuff, the other pile. No the other pile. Third pile of stuff from the end.
***
Bunny: So what DVD did your mom give you?
Me: Cry_wolf.
Bunny: I didn't believe you. You should have bought Serenity today.
Sunday
The Chicken: Dad, are you done putting it together yet?
Me: No, not yet.
(three minutes pass)
Chicken: Dad, are you done putting it together yet?
Me: No, not yet.
(three minutes pass)
Chicken: Dad, are you done putting it together yet?
Me: No, not yet.
(three minutes pass)
Chicken: Dad, are you done putting it together yet?
Me: Yes! Here you go.
(three minutes pass)
Chicken: Dad, it broke, can you put it back together again?
***
Me: Do you want to watch a movie while Mommy naps?
Chicken: Yeah!
Me: Which one?
Chicken: Godzilla!
(I reach for Godzilla.)
Chicken: No, I mean Herbie!
(I reach for Herbie.)
Chicken: No, I mean Ed, Edd n Eddy!
(I reach for Ed, Edd n Eddy.)
Chicken: No, I mean Inspector Gadget Christmas!
Me: Ed, Edd n Eddy it is.
Monday
Chicken: Dad, will you make me waffles?
Me: Hell no!
Chicken: But Dad! Mom always makes me waffles!
Me: I'm not Mom.
(pause)
Me: Get dressed, let's go out for waffles.
***
Me: Ok, what do you want for breakfast?
Chicken: Waffles, eggs, bacon, sausage and toast.
Me: You're not going to get all of that.
Chicken: Ok, how about… waffles, eggs, bacon… sausage… and toast?
Me: Chicken, they don't offer eggs or waffles as a side item. And I'm not buying you two breakfasts. You have to choose eggs or waffles. So which do you want? Eggs or waffles?
Chicken: Eggs and waffles.
Me: You're not following. You can't get both eggs and waffles. You have to pick one or the other.
Chicken: Eggs and waffles.
Me: You might not survive the morning.
***
Waitress: Here you are. Enjoy your breakfast, fellas.
Chicken: Dad, she brought the eggs, but she forgot my waffles.
Me: You didn't order waffles, remember?
Chicken: Oh. Yeah. I want waffles.
***
Amy (lovely young woman at Sam Goody): On your Visa card today?
Visa card: No, no! I'm already bleeding! I can't take anymore of this! Help me, help me!
***
Chicken: Dad, can we go to the video store and rent PlayStation games?
Me: Sure. I was planning on that.
Chicken: Can we go now?
Me: No, first we're going to get haircuts.
Chicken: What?!?
***
RNB: I was never comfortable in that neighborhood. Lotta spics down there.
(silence)
***
Bartender: What can I get you?
Me: Bud Light, please.
Bartender: And for you?
RNB: Budweiser.
Me: You should really ask this young man for his ID.
(RNB hands it over.)
Bartender: Wow! Happy birthday! You want a birthday shot?
(silence)
Me: Yes, he'd love a birthday shot!
Bartender: What are you drinking?
(silence)
Me: We'll have Cuervo. And a salt shaker please.
RNB: Ugh.
***
Drunken Buffoon: Are you Filipino?
Bartender: I'm half Filipino.
Drunken Buffoon: So you're Filipino.
Bartender: No… I'm half Filipino.
Drunken Buffoon: So you're Filipino.
Bartender: Get you another beer?
***
RNB: Girls around here don't seem to be into rednecks.
Me: You sure they're just not into you?
RNB: Uh, thanks.
Me: I'm not picking on you. I'm just saying you're getting a reputation.
RNB: True. Yeah, maybe that's it.
***
RNB: Next weekend I'm bringing Jesse up here to move in with me.
Me: You're moving your girlfriend into Mom's house.
RNB: Yeah.
Me: I'm still amazed that Mom is ok with this.
RNB: Yeah, me too.
Me: Pat [our stepdad] know about this yet?
RNB: Sort of. He thinks she's just visiting during the semester break.
Me: Technically true, I suppose. But he has no idea she's staying?
RNB: Mom says we've got to have our own place by February 1st.
Me: You gonna make that?
RNB: I hope so.
Me: How much money do you have saved?
RNB: Uh, none.
Me: February 1st, huh?
***
Drunken Buffoon: Respect.
Bartender: What?
Drunken Buffoon: Respect.
Bartender: Ok.
Drunken Buffoon: That's the most important thing in life. Respect.
Bartender: Ok, sure.
Drunken Buffoon: You get one chance at that.
Bartender: Ok.
Drunken Buffoon: One chance.
(silence)
Drunken Buffoon: And now I see what you did with your one chance.
Bartender: Excuse me? I don't follow.
Drunken Buffoon: One chance.
(Drunken Buffoon stumbles out.)
Bartender: What was that all about?
Guy at end of bar: Ah, don't worry. He's always like that.
***
Bartender: More beers?
Me: Yes, please. It's all about respect you know.
Bartender: Don't you start.
Me: One chance. That's all you get. Just one chance to pour that beer respectfully.
Bartender (laughing): Shut up!
***
RNB: Thanks for the present. Thanks for dinner. Thanks for the beers.
Me: No problem. Happy Birthday.
RNB (smiling): Thanks.
***
Chicken: Dad, I don't have school tomorrow. Why can't I stay up late?
Me: You already have stayed up late. It's an hour past your bedtime. Now it's time for bed.
Chicken: But why can't I stay up late… er? Later.
***
Me (thinking): I'll be glad when this weekend is over and I can get back to my routine.
Tuesday
Me (thinking): "Back to my routine?" What the fuck was I thinking? Was I drunk?
(pause)
Me (thinking): Yeah, I was a little drunk.
Sunday, November 27, 2005
Nothing lasts forever, even cold November rain…
About thirty minutes ago I went out for some drive-thru breakfast. I've found that Sunday mornings are always a little nicer with breakfast burritos.
It's raining here today.
I think I've discovered a new Murphy's law. Regardless of their age, my windshield wipers always break in the winter.
I was waiting in line in the drive-thru and I noticed the driver's side wiper is falling apart. (That's another Murphy's law: the driver's side wiper will always break first.) The bottom end of this wiper all messed up. The metal piece is separated, the rubber insert is falling out… basically it's fucked.
Which really pisses me off. I was trying to plan ahead and I just bought new blades in August. And that's blades, mind you. I didn't cheap out and buy the crappy inserts. I bought all new blades. And three months later they're falling apart anyway.
That Murphy guy is a prick.