I'm really looking forward to Spider-Man 3, and not just because I want to watch the movie. I'm hoping that whatever way the filmmakers explain Venom will finally be satisfactory to The Chicken. I don't recall exactly how Chicken first discovered Venom. Perhaps it was a Spider-Man cartoon, or maybe looking through my old trading cards. However he learned of him, Venom quickly became Chicken's favorite.

Do you know anything about Venom's origin? It's not something easily explained to a little kid. In the mid 80s there was a comic book mini-series called "Secret Wars." In this story, all of Earth's greatest heroes and villains were transported to a constructed world at the edge of the universe to settle the good vs. evil debate with a grand battle royale. The God-like being who arranged this conflict provided fantastic machines for each side to use for various purposes, including costume repair. The folks at Marvel used this as an opportunity to introduce a lot of new costumes, including Spider-Man's sechsee black outfit.

In the comic, Spider-Man, his suit in tatters, wanders off to find this magic costume making machine. He finds something looking like a cross between an old school espresso machine and a jet engine that produces a little black globule. He touches it and it swarms over him like the blob. (The sci-fi movie blob, not the comic book Blob… sorry for switching streams like that on you.) This new costume is a smart costume. It produces its own webbing, it changes shape and color and it even responds to Spider-Man's thoughts. Plus, it looks awesome. The black costume is definitely my favorite.

But there's a problem, which isn't revealed until much later. It's not a smart costume. It's an alien life form and it's trying to bond with Spider-Man permanently. This is of course a Bad Thing.

Spider-Man learns this alien is vulnerable to sound. He sheds it once and for all by tearing it off his body in the bell tower of a cathedral while the bells are tolling. Initially Spider-Man thought this killed the alien, but not so. Also in the cathedral was Eddie Brock, a reporter who'd staked his career on a story Spider-Man proved to be false. United by their despair and their hatred of Spider-Man, Brock and the alien symbiote merged for good, creating the entity known as Venom. And that's the part where I lose Chicken.

Eddie Brock was a separate being. The alien was a separate being. They have now merged to create one being. Venom is Brock and the alien combined. Venom is not Brock in an alien costume. Brock no longer exists. The alien no longer exists. There is only Venom.

I have explained this to Chicken in dozens of different ways. I've come up with a new explanation about every two weeks for the past three or four years. I cannot find an explanation that leaves him truly understanding it. The newest explanation involves candy bar analogies.

Chicken: So, when Eddie Brock is wearing the Venom suit…

Me: It's not a suit, Chicken. Eddie and the alien are one thing. They are Venom.

Chicken: Uh… um…

Me: Ok, it's like a candy bar, right?

Chicken: I don't get it.

Me: Eddie Brock is like nougat.

Chicken: Ok.

Me: The alien is like chocolate.

Chicken: Ok.

Me: When they were separate, they were chocolate and nougat, Eddie and alien.

Chicken: Ok.

Me: Now they are combined. They are one thing. They are the candy bar. They are Venom.

Chicken: Ok…

Me: Do you see?

Chicken: So… Venom is like Eddie Brock covered in chocolate? Does Venom eat chocolate?

(pause)

Chicken: Can I have a candy bar?

I will be one happy Fish if Sam Raimi succeeds in explaining this damn thing.