*Subtitle: Wow, it only took me a month to finish talking about a week-long vacation!
The last day of my vacation was really anti-climactic, so I'm going to get that out of the way first. On Sunday, we did even more nothing. Maybe even less than nothing. We all slept late and spent the entire day in our pajamas. We watched some DVDs, snacked instead of eating actual meals, and spent hours playing video games. Mostly Disney's Extreme Skate Adventure and Tak 2: Staff of Dreams for GameCube. And that's really about it. Like I said, we just might have done less than nothing. This was the end of the vacation. The next day was back to work. Blech.
The real adventure of the weekend was Sister and Annie's housewarming party on Saturday. Late in the afternoon we loaded up the car with our beverages (mostly beer), the food (a tray of brownies and Girlfriend's superb taco dip), and our gifts for the girls.
We brought two gifts. Unfortunately, neither of them was a giant can of nacho cheese sauce. The "real" gift was something girly. Candles and lotions or some crap like that. I was just as surprised as the girls were. I forgot what it was immediately after they opened it.
The other gift was a giant box of liquor. Girlfriend and I cleaned out our cupboard and decided to give them the vast quantity of half-drunk booze bottles we'd accumulated over the years. Schnapps, gin, vodka, whiskey… we had a bottle of just about everything. And we were never going to use it. All we kept was my Jack Daniels and my Cuervo. I'll drink those. Everything else was just sitting around getting dusty. Anyway, our gift of inebriation was very well received. There were "oohs" and "ahhs," a few "holy shits," and I suspect a few erect nipples as well.
Not long after arriving, Sister casually slipped in something about The Grade School Teacher and her husband coming to the party. She always does that to me and, foolishly, I never see it coming. Grade School Teacher is one of my least favorite people. It never occurs to me that she'll be at any particular gathering, and Sister always "forgets" to mention it until after I'm already there.
As with most parties, there wasn't really any structured series of events. Nearly the entire party was everyone sitting around, slowly getting drunk, and laughing at each other. All total, there were fifteen or twenty people there. Among the guests were a few blogstars, including Sister of course, Giggs and husband, the inestimable Keeks, and even Meow. Meow is a third-shifter right now, so she looked a bit startled at having been dragged out into the light.
Highlights of the party, in no particular order, included:
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Sister's friend "S" making an ass out of himself by attempting to describe how racially-oriented humor is only funny when it's offensive and genuinely racist
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Giggs dog clawing up her brand new tent. Serves her right for owning a dirty, dirty dog.
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Keeks arriving with a unique alcoholic treat - liquor soaked gummy bears. Leave it to Keeks to come up with something intoxicating that needs to be sucked to be appreciated.
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The "little boy" who was hitting on Keeks. And doing so rather badly.
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When Keeks' cellphone rang, I may have answered. I may have told the gentleman caller on the line that she couldn't talk at the moment because her mouth was full.
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On a possibly related note, somebody or other placed Keeks in charge of pleasuring me. It wrote this down to make sure I wouldn't forget, but I forgot to write down any context. So feel free to make that as dirty as you want.
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Somebody or other, probably Keeks, was appointed Official Whipped Cream Girl. (She wasn't the only one at this party, honest.)
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The two strangers who walked in the front door and into the bathroom without saying a word.
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Me twice sneaking over to the corner of the living room to remove all the country songs from Sister's iTunes playlist.
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The bathroom door stays closed nicely on its own, but there is no latch. So every time I walked by, I opened the door and left it open. I was very entertained by this. Several other people were not so entertained.
There are probably many other entertaining things that happened, but that was a month ago, and I don't remember anything else. We ate, we drank, we laughed. We all had a great time, but I've been to better parties. After all, no one ended up naked. But then, this was my little sister's party, so it's not like I would've wanted that anyway.
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