(There are sirens in the neighborhood, several of them pass my office.)

Goat: Lotta sirens today.

Me: Yeah, seems like more than usual.

Goat: Maybe somebody knocked over a light pole nearby.

(The phone rings.)

Goat: Fish, it's your seester.

Me: (On phone) Yo.

Sister: How you doin'?

Me: Yo.

Sister: So do you have a good view of the fire there?

Me: What?

Sister: Turn around and look out your window.

Me: Holy shit! That red house is on fire!

Sister: Dumbass.

Me: Ok, I'm going to go. You're way more boring that this action.

Sister: Ok!
 

So, yeah. Big ass fire in the red house across the street. No one was injured (not even the family dog), but the house is a total loss. The flames were ten feet higher than the roof by the time the fire department started throwing water at it.

At its simplest, this is not especially exciting. There was a fire. The fire department put it out. Woo hoo. But, oh, the spectacle!

All the streets around my office were closed for almost five hours, which made for a pretty light day. And everyone in the neighborhood stopped to gawk for a while, so the people watching was excellent. Sighted were Unfriendly Black Hottie from the chiropractor's down the street, The Captain (a late middle age guy who always dresses like Gilligan's gay uncle - complete with a Skipper-style hat), Naked Guy (who, weather permitting, wears only cheap flip-flops and raggedy short-short cut off jeans), and the String Bean Mechanic (who looks like a complete dirt bag, but is always so friendly). There were plenty of other gawkers, maybe as many as 300 different people over the course of the day, but none of them are interesting enough to merit a clever nickname.

I happened to be listening to some music on my PDA when all of this was happening. Evil, insensitive bastard that I am, I tried to choose music appropriate to the situation. What kind of music is goes with a neighbor's house fire? I didn't have anything like Bloodhound Gang's "The Roof Is On Fire" or Johnny Cash's "Ring of Fire." The best I could do is Guns 'N Roses. "Welcome to the Jungle" kind of works. At least it's a lot more fitting than the new Dixie Chicks CD.

My favorite part of the whole experience is that this has been an entire day where not one person has stared at me when I've stood outside smoking. And all my temporary invisibility required was for one family to lose everything.